Welcome to our 50th episode of Nerdy Bitches Podcast!! We will be discussing the world of Adulting to celebrate this auspicious occasion! We will be talking about what we thought being an adult would be like as a kid versus the harsh reality, what we would recover from childhood if we could, and what we wouldn’t go back to for anything. We also had some fans weigh in on the issue, so we will give them a shout-out as well!
All About Adulting
We have been wanting to do this for a while, so we decided to bust it out for our 50th episode! Heather recently went to a Podcasting 101 panel (Producer Craig was on the panel), so she talks about that, even though she can’t remember the names of people. Sorry guys!
As always, we go off on a tangent about horror movies and why we really can’t watch them like we did when we were kids/teenagers.
As a kid, what did you think being an adult would be like?
What has been the reality of adulthood?
What do you wish you could recover from childhood?
What would you never go back to?
Notes From the Fans
Mary S. – “I thought that I would FEEL LIKE an adult (you know, on the inside!). I’m 50 and I feel like I’m about 18.”
Monica B. – “I thought I could have ANYTHING I wanted. Turns out I had everything I wanted as a kid, less so as an adult. I also thought that my memories would be the same color and quality as photos. You know, the grainy, dull color of poloroids? Yeah, I thought as an adult my memories of being a child would look like that in my head.”
Liberty S. – Definitely didn’t expect the marital strife and the bill paying. Also expected to be doing better than I am at my age (mid-30s).
Magdalena S. – Complete freedom but that is not the case at all
Drew W. – I thought I’d be able to just buy whatever I want as soon as I got a job. When you kill yourself for half the day to make a dollar to go to the store, six bucks and hour looks like opulence of an immesurable magnitude. Of course, I still kind of buy whatever I want as an adult anyway. Thank God for credit card debt.
Kramer M. – I thought I’d have free time. I thought after college I’d be able to come home and just do whatever I wanted for 4 to 5 hours. Oh, and sleep.
@nerdthugradio – Totally thought adult life meant weekly visits the Home Depot and I was wrong.
@sealeadams – 1. theory: cereal for dinner is possible. reality: achievement unlocked! 2. theory: I’d be married with kids by now. reality: dodged that bullet. 3. theory: I would one day like broccoli. reality: go to hell broccoli.
@80sMveGraveyard: I just figured I would have been a pro wrestler with the world’s largest comic collection.
@tipsyreview: There are more dishes than I had hoped for. Also, BILLS!
@zakfield: Thought being an adult would be boring work then I started playing D&D + building robots + VR.
In the Holiday Gift Guide episode, Liz and Heather talk about some awesome gifts to give to the geek/nerd in your life.
A big congrats to Liz’s sister on the birth of the newest little nerdy bitch, Miss Olivia! She’s super cute!
It’s hard to buy gifts for geeks, if you are an outsider. Even if you are outside of someone’s specific geek genre, it can be a chore. In this episode, we talk about some good guidelines for buying for others without looking like a tool.
Think Geek is an awesome place to start. They have a fantastic gift giving guide for the holidays, and the “Gifts for Her” isn’t stupid condescending like other lists we have seen.
Look into the fandoms that your geek likes and make sure you get the right one. (Star Trek vs. Star Wars – Do not mix these up)
Be aware that gaming gifts can be tricky – they may not have the same console, or they may have already bought the latest and greatest. Perhaps a gift card towards a game is a better plan.
Create a wish list with a lot of stuff on it in various price ranges. Too few things on the wishlist basically ruins the surprise of what people buy for you.
Order EARLY – Things are often sold out or slow to ship or can be confused with the wrong order, and by the time you realize it is wrong, the thing you want may be sold out.
Pay attention to the hints they are dropping – or flat out telling you what they want.
DO NOT fall for the “I don’t want a gift” line if you are dating. It will go badly for you.
DO NOT buy clothes. You will never get it right. Unless you are my mom.
Be careful with jewelry. Rings have sizes, but so do necklaces. Cuff bracelets and long necklaces are usually safe.
Don’t buy slippers. We don’t want them. No one wants them. Unless they are the Monty Python Bunny Slippers. (You also cannot wear slippers with dogs – FYI)
DO NOT buy a lady any sort of kitchen appliance, apron, or vacuum. Even if they are really cool – don’t fall for it. There is still deep seeded resentment on the feeling that we are supposed to be cleaning.
Specific examples of holiday gift ideas:
Death Star Waffle Iron
USB Car Chargers (Flux Capacitor, R2D2, etc)
D20 Mug and Death Star Tea Infuser
Hermione’s Time Turner Necklace
Check out Etsy for handmade gifts – Search for geeky gifts. My favorite is my Pixel People cross-stitch pattern maker where I got my Golden Girls and Star Wars patterns.
Liz: Furiously Happy (Book) by Jenny Lawson (aka The Bloggess) – Super funny look at life with mental illness
In this episode, Liz and Heather discuss their favorite bits of information about the Harry Potter world after-the-fact (Potter After Dark).
On the tail of Heather attending Houston’s Comicpalooza, we discuss all of our favorite things we have learned about the Harry Potter universe after the series ended. A lot of this came from the Jason Isaacs’ (Lucius Malfoy) panel at the convention.
ANNOUNCEMENT: We have a giveaway! At Comicpalooza, met an awesome artist who gave us a Wonder Woman print ($60 retail value) to give away on our podcast!! Sweet!!!
In order to qualify to be in the drawing for this print, we will announce the keyword sometime throughout this podcast – you need to tweet us, Facebook, Instagram, or e-mail us the keyword. You have until July 31, 2015 to enter! You need to make sure it is addressed to us, and you can post the keyword. On August 1st, we will randomly draw the winner and will contact you if you win! We will also announce the winner on our podcast following the drawing. So sign up! The print is amazing!!
Jason Isaacs as Lucius Malfoy Harry Potter
Topic 1 – Jason Isaacs’ appearance at Houston’s Comicpalooza 2015 and how he impacted the outcome of the Lucius Malfoy character. The video is on YouTube, so make sure to check that out.
Topic 2 – Harry Potter facts we learned after the series/movies ended
Dumbledore is gay. – We never thought anything about this.
Rowling is the first person to become a billionaire by writing books.
Fred & George Weasley were born on April Fool’s Day.
Draco Malfoy attended Fred’s funeral. He stood in the far back, careful not to be seen. He’d never let on that he secretly thought the twins were quite funny, and he was truly sorry he’d been part of the reason Fred died. He felt that way about all who died, but he would have never attended the funeral. Draco would never tell anyone he was there, and George would never tell anyone he saw Draco cry, apologizing to the headstone.
Vladimir Putin was pissed about the portrayal of Dobbie because he felt it was based on him.
Dumbledore & Harry saw the same thing when they looked into the Mirror of Erised – Themselves reunited with their families.
Voldemort was incapable of loving someone because he was conceived under the effect of a love potion.
A Patronus often mutates to take the image of the love of one’s life because they so often become the happy thought that generates a Patronus. This is why Snape’s Patronus was Lily’s doe.
Severus Snape is the only Deatheater who can produce a Patronus.
Harry, Ron, and Herminoe were all put on Chocolate Frog cards. Both Ron and Albus Dumbledore consider this their greatest achievements
Topic 4 – Horcrux in Harry vs. the Dursleys (from the article) – Is this why they were so cruel? Horcruxes make people that much worse, even if they are already terrible people. We don’t know if this is intentional by Rowling, but it makes sense to us and becomes Head Canon.
Topic 3 – From the article “37 things the Harry Potter movies need to answer (to the books)”, here are a few that we agree definitely needed to be mentioned in the movies.
Aunt Petunia’s howler from Dumbledore and why they were unable to just kick Harry out when they clearly hated him. They don’t explain to the audience why Petunia was so jealous and hateful.
The Elder wand – in the book, he uses the wand to mend his own wand and then places it back with Dumbledore. In the movie, without fixing his own wand – he breaks it in half and chucks it over the side of the bridge.
Where the heck did the Weasley twins get the money to open a shop when their family is really poor? They got it from Harry.
Dumbledore’s backstory. Seriously? “This was his sister” is about all that comes out of it, when it was truly complex.
The Marauders were never explained – Who were they and how were they connected to Harry? And what did Harry do with the map after Hogwarts?
All memories connected with horcruxes are removed, so how can people really understand what they are?
Weasley house fire. That never happened. How could they afford to rebuild?
Internet comment of the week – “I didn’t get in, but it was still neat to have a small owl deliver my rejection letter.” – Commentary from The Onion
Bitch of the Week – (Heather) – Stores not having enough people to run the store. Especially during the busiest times of the day! The stores are trying to save money by cutting their employees, but they are doing it at the expense of their customers.
Mr. Massingill Award – The dude with the shoe ad. (check out Pinterest page for the full report)
Liz – Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt (Netflix series)
Heather – Criminal Activities (movie – coming out Sept/Oct 2015)
AND Bossypants by Tina Fey (book)
Don’t forget to enter into the drawing!! This print is really cool! Send us the keyword through social media or through e-mail!!
Welcome to Vag Power, with the Nerdy Bitches! In this episode, Heather and Liz discuss how women are portrayed in movies, video games, and comics.
Liz tells her story of her niece’s realization of how discount/overstock stores work. Nerdy bitch in the making? Absolutely!
Comment from Jessica, a loyal listener:
“Right now I’m playing Legion of Heroes on my android phone and am trying to figure out the practicality of a lot of the outfits. I play games sometimes and I have to wear a blanket OVER my official gaming bathrobe because my female characters look so fucking cold….”
“I know men are the main demographic for video games, and I know men like seeing scantily clad women. Got it, but how would men feel if they saw their character fighting trolls on a snowy mountain in a Speedo? Their testicles would shrink INTO their small intestines.”
Fair point, Jessica. We agree!! Check out this video that completely describes what you are talking about: Female Armor Sucks
Even your average three-year old understands that it isn’t fair that Wonder Woman doesn’t get armor, but Batman does (with nipples!)
Listen to how we feel about an all-female Avengers. Check out the Hawkeye Initiative to see how it would really look if male characters were drawn like female characters. (And we vote Death to Duckface!!)
The Bechdel Test – Does it have a good representation of women?
It has to have at least two named-female characters in it,
who talk to each other, and
about something besides a man.
What movies failed? Avengers, Spiderman, Batman (new or old), Superman
Let’s talk about the ways in which media has gotten women’s roles right:
Agents of Shield
Big Bang Theory
Guardians of the Galaxy
What does the future hold? We’ve come a long way, but still have a ways to go. We have hope with Wonder Woman and Captain Marvel coming up in the next few years.
ANNOUNCEMENT: We are announcing our first official choice for the Nerdy Bitches Book Club: Princess Bride by William Goldman. We will be discussing this book in three weeks (Episode 12)! Go, read it. Then listen. It’s a book club, so there will absolutely be spoilers.
Random – Liz reveals her awesome Zombie Apocalypse Plan. Heather is just planning to burn her home down while still inside.
Bitch of the Week: Electronic addictions. Video games (Heather) and Internet (Liz).
Out of Context Quote of the Week:
“A story about a female superhero is just too far-fetched. Studios won’t make what they can’t sell. They’ll stick to machine gun raccoons and emotionally complex house plants. It’s just easier for people to relate.” –BigLuca
Heather: The Hawkeye Initative (thehawkeyeinitiative.com)
Liz: The Ghost and the Darkness (movie) – on Netflix
Welcome to the wonderful world of Pinterest! This week, we talk about how amazing and addictive Pinterest can be for the average bear.
We talk about Pinterest followers and basic Pinterest etiquette.
Repinning cool shit from other people
Creating a wishlist (and buying things for people based on things they have pinned)
Remembering to change the text from another pinner so you don’t look like an illiterate dumbshit
Tater tot casserole (aka Funeral potatoes)
Things that we like to pin:
Shit we want.
Food. We like to eat.
Things we would love to do in our home, but never will.
Fan art, tattoos, etc. that we love, but can’t afford to buy.
Recommendations for our podcast (go check our site here).
Pinterest can be so fun, but it can also be a massive time-suck. It is a procrastinator’s dream! Imagine a place where people can find a Golden Girls cross-stitch pattern (and buy it), find a new recipe that you just HAVE to try, Harry Potter house scarves, AND people with your same sense of humor? This is your place.
The visual part of Pinterest is so much better than using Bookmarks in your browser. It makes it easier to remember things that you have seen and want to use/try/do. We probably would have never found Etsy without the wonder of Pinterest!! And that, friends, would be a real shame. Also, CROCHETED SHARK SOCKS!!!!
Our Mr. Massingil Award and Bitch of the Week goes to (from Tinder): Josh. Wow.
Tangent – Online dating. Yikes!
Liz: Firefly (TV series) and Serenity (Movie) – Available on Netflix
Heather: Chuck (TV series) – Available on Netflix
So, sit back with your iPad or laptop and listen to us talk about Pinterest.
Make sure to e-mail us at ContactUs@nerdybitches.com and subscribe to our podcast on iTunes. Feel free to leave a 5-star rating!!
Welcome to the Nerdy Bitches Toy Nostalgia episode! This episode, we are talking toys! Not those toys… kid toys that we loved and those that are making a come back for the newer generations.
We talk about toys and series which have made a comeback:
My Little Pony
And others that would NEVER be allowed today that our parents totally bought for us and/or things that would never work with kids:
Pogo balls (basically, all things jumping and breaking your leg)
Speak and Spell – These were awesome in the day, but they would never fly with today’s tech-savvy kids
Alfie the Robot
Some of our favorites:
He-Man/She-Ra (and the gender differences between the series – condescending, much?)
Barbie (We don’t actually like her, but we talk about that crazy bitch a lot)
Fashion Plates, Lite-Brite, Spirograph, and more!
This is the Poochie stamper
We have also seen a huge resurgence in old toys popping up on E-Bay for big bucks! We probably could have paid for college with the money off the old toys. But if you really think you will buy new toys in order to sell them later – you’re probably a hoarder. Seek help (read: Beanie Babies crazies).
What did we do before the Internet?? We ordered shit out of the back of catalogs and comic strip books. We used stamps and self-addressed stamped envelopes (SASEs!) to buy Sea Monkeys and shit.
While we are not nostalgic for the less-technological days, we do miss the toys. They were way cooler than the toys that are out today. Lawn darts and blow guns and BB-guns, oh my!
Best Christmas gift ever:
Heather: Game Boy
Liz: Ballerina doll (Dream Dancer)
Worst Christmas gift ever:
Heather: Tin tea sets
Liz: Video tape rewinder
Bitch of the Week – Dogs and Fireworks do not go together. Liz’s poor dogs were completely terrorized by fireworks for two solid weeks. No bueno.
Heather: Moulin Rouge (Netflix) and Hugo (kid’s film)
Liz: Shark Week!! Completely obsessed with Shark Week, and Planet Earth (BBC version), and all things nature shows.
For suggestions or future topics, email us at ContactUs@nerdybitches.com! You can also follow us on Pinterest, Twitter, and Instagram. Be sure to leave an awesome 5-star review on iTunes or comment on this post.
Spoilers… In episode 4, we talk about Doctor Who companions.
We focus on the reboot of Doctor Who, starting with the 9th Doctor, in 2005. Companions covered are:
Captain Jack Harkness
Sarah Jane Smith
Amy & Rory (“The Ponds”)
River Song/Melody Pond
Craig Owen (only in 2 episodes, but we love him!)
Clara Oswald (in all her iterations)
We discuss our favorites and least favorites companions throughout the series. We love River Song. She is the number one on both of our lists. We also love Captain Jack! The Ponds also made it to our favorites list. Donna Noble makes the list in our favorite for all of her snark, wit, and personality.
Donna wins our vote for the saddest ending for any companion.
Our Most Hated Least Favorites – Mickey (the Tin Dog!), Martha Jones (UGH!), Clara (Booooring!), and early Rose Tyler (we liked her better going forward).
We also talk a bit about the show’s writers, including a slight debate regarding Russell T. Davies vs. Steven Moffett. Who writes the cheesier episodes? Who writes the best day-to-day shows versus big plot twists?
What is the point of the companion for the Doctor? Why does he need them and what do they bring to the table for a Time Lord?
Feed the Troll – from Sunderland56 – “To be fair, if she had two female parents, and no male in the house, How would she learn to drive?” … Seriously?
Out of Context Comment of the Week – from YouTube – Braden says, “Likes dogs and cats.” That is definitely a controversial topic… ??
Bitch of the Week – High School Reunions – WTF? Why is it 6 months too early? Where the hell did the time go? This is not ok. Do you feel like a grown-up? We still don’t. But we are old. And it sucks. The End.
Marvel is Ah-may-zing! This episode, we talk all things Marvel and the past, present, and future of the Marvel cinematic universe.
The phases of the Marvel universe include:
Phase 1: Iron Man, The Incredible Hulk (Edward Norton), Iron Man 2, Thor, Captain America (swoon!), and The Avengers.
Phase 2: Iron Man 3, Thor: The Dark World, Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D (TV), Agent Carter (TV), Guardians of the Galaxy (HOLY CRAP!!), Avengers: Age of Ultron, and Ant-Man.
Phase 3: Captain America: Civil War, Doctor Strange, Guardians of the Galaxy 2, Thor: Ragnarok, Black Panther, Avengers: Infinity War – Part I, Captain Marvel, Inhumans, and Avengers: Infinity War – Part II.
We talk about each of the movies in turn that are already out, and the ones upcoming. We spend a lot of time talking Guardians of the Galaxy because it’s freaking awesome.
Well now I’m standing. Happy? We’re all standing now. Bunch of jackasses, standing in a circle. – Rocket
Bitch of the Week – Women’s geeky t-shirt sizes. Why the hell are they so small? Men don’t have this problem when attempting to buy clothing!
Feed the Troll – “If we didn’t have Democrats, we wouldn’t need police.” … Really.
from Heather – John Carter (movie) – with a disclaimer: If you loved the original story/book, don’t watch the movie.
HOBBITS!! Or Hobbitses, if you prefer the Smeagol/Gollum pronunciation. Either way, we love them!
Bag End – Hobbiton – The Shire – Middle-earth
This week, we cover all things Middle-earth, Hobbit-ish, and Peter Jackson (as related to these films (LOTR, and The Hobbit). The basic truth is that we LOVE them. Whether you read the books or only saw the movies, you have to love these stories. If not, get the hell off our podcast! Just kidding… sort of…
We discuss the transition from book to movies – should they have been translated into three movies? Did they destroy the plot line? Did they overstep their bounds by showing so much of the White Council?
We also talk about the technical aspects of high frame rate (48 fps) photography and 3D and our opinions on whether those are worth the high ticket prices. And motion capture – Andy Serkis and Benedict Cumberbatch are both completely amazing in their motion capture roles of Gollum and Smaug, respectively.
And… SPIDERS! What the hell is up with all of the spiders in movies? We blame Tolkein for spiders popping up in various movies and shows like Harry Potter and Doctor Who. And that giant puppy-sized spider in our real world?? Just – No.
And we discuss the characters and actors portraying them, inclusive of random characters that were never in the book.
Bitch of the Week – Ebola. Scare tactics and fear-mongering in the media after the recent scare in the U.S.– This is clearly medical science’s Super Bowl, much like the weatherman’s hurricane here on the Gulf Coast.
Random Internet Comments taken out of context – from DaddyScratches, “The time to buy a used, almost free Bobcat is when you see one. That’s what my old Grandpappy used to say.” Sound advice, DaddyScratches. Machinery or wildcat? You decide.
From Heather – BoJack Horseman (animated series) – available on Netflix
From Liz – Daria (animated series) – Entire series available on HuluPlus